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Assisted Reproduction

So What Is Really Going On In Those Collection Rooms At IVF Clinics?

It never occurred to me the that it was any great mystery. Apparently I was wrong. Pam Madsen, in her inimitable style, weighs in on this controversy:

Have a mentioned recently how much I love Facebook? The heated debate in my news feed this week was a post that Sharon LaMothe put to the group “Should Fertility Clinics Stock Porn? That’s the question of the night…..and if it’s not porn what should it be called??”

And off it went – post after post about whether or not there should be porn allowed in the semen collection room! Really? What did we all think was happening in the “Collection Room”? What exactly were we debating here? Come on – really and truly – how exactly was that collection suppose to happen without a little ah – stimulation? For God’s sake – these poor guys!

But the posts kept coming – people wanted to know who was in charge of buying of the porn – and the choosing of the porn. One poster felt that it should only be “straight” porn. No fetish porn allowed except of course if it was clearly marked. And how would the clinic mark “Fetish Porn” – would they have a “Really Kinky Folks” box? Would the nursing staff know that you went for the kinky box? Would you have to sign it out?

What I love about my fertility community is the use of the right lingo – this is really not porn it’s actually “collection aids”. And one poster reassured another very upset contributor to the conversation who felt that the whole business was quite disgusting – and that her husband who was a “Christian Man” found the materials left in the collection room “really disgusting”. I won’t even go into the conversation and worry about other men being in the room before her husband…

This gal – the one that was offended by the porn was reassured by others in the thread that she really didn’t have to worry about her husband in the collection room – because “It’s really very sterile and not fun or sexy at all”….

I loved it when “M” added her two cents to the conversation:
“My husband is a Christian man as well and I think as adults we have the choice to either use the porn or not use it. I don’t think God is going to strike us down because our husbands used a collection aid to help us achieve a goal of having a child. The judgment piece of this is disturbing. It’s difficult enough to have to endure what we have to endure — and I think the fertility clinics realize that it’s not always easy to ejaculate on command, let alone ejaculate in a room that is often right off the waiting and reception area where you can hear everything going on around you. And to add insult to injury to have to walk back out of that reception area red faced because half the room knows what transpired 10 minutes ago”.

Part of me truly couldn’t believe that we were have this discussion – and that it was turning into a heated debate! After all – so much of this is so subjective! Oprah just had a huge segment on her show about how women LOVE porn! It seems to me that an awful lot of us say what we say and then want what we want! The purpose of the collection room is masturbation. It is not a library or a place of worship. I say give these guys really good PORN and encourage spouses to go in the rooms with the men – and maybe put in a cooler with some beer!!! Let’s not pretend what this is all about. The guys have to get excited enough to create a sample!!! Tame or prayer may not do the job.


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